The Village

Moving to a new Village

2008-06-20T21:31:00.000-07:00

The Village is moving to a new home!
Find my new random thoughts at
www.allthingsizabella.typepad.com/me/

And come back often.

Sickness and Selling

2008-06-11T20:53:00.000-07:00

Tragedy and Triumph!
We all have the stomach flu, but...I have an offer on my house!

Daddy was in Indianapolis over the weekend for a family reunion and came back with a bad bug. We thought it was food poisoning until today...when Mom got it. I don't have anything full blown yet, but there is definately some rumbling going on. They have been like zombies today, and I have been crazy with the anti-bac wipes and handwashing. (my germaphobic-ness is in overdrive!) For two days the only food in this house has been toast, chicken soup (made in my new BergHoff pot!), yogurt, and jello. Sounds delicious! Mom and I were planning to drive back to NashVegas Friday, but we're going to have to play that by ear. Daddy has been retching since Sunday.

On to the house news.
We haggled last night until nearly midnight, but finally came to an agreement. He wants to close by the end of the month! If everything goes as planned, I won't have to make one more house payment! It's kind of weird. I guess I'm going to put all my earthly possessions into storage somewhere and stay with the Braisted's until God points out the next step. At least I know what the very next step is... Packing! After the spa it was getting the house ready to sell. Then I had this free trip to see the 'rents. Now it's packing up. I have applied for a few positions in ministries, and have kept my eyes on the websites, ...but so far God has not been telling me to SEARCH for a job. We have had a few conversations about this...it feels weird to not HAVE to have a job IMMEDIATELY. But He told me He will take care of it...And I am trying to learn a deeper level of trust. It isn't always easy, and feels strange, and I'm sure looks irresponsible from the outside...But I need to learn this trust. And God is leading...Deeper.

Heat and the World

2008-06-08T18:11:00.000-07:00

Updating from Sunny Florida...where it is 300,000 degrees with more humidity than the ocean. (so I'm a little dramatic. that's why you love me!)

Last night Mom and I drove to Orlando to meet my dear friend, Sharyl, at the International Conference of the Wesleyan Church. Spectacular! I may be a card carrying member of a Baptist church, but I'm a Wesleyan in my heart. A true Calvimenian. :) In other words, although I would love to believe in eternal security, I am not going to live my life as if that were true.

Back to the evening. Representatives from more than 50 countries wearing native dress proudly carried the flag of their homeland in an amazingly beautiful ceremony. The Chairman (Dr. Earle Wilson, who also spoke at my brother's ordination) spoke, we sang praise (in our native tongues...it was amazing to hear all the languages), we heard testimony of what missionaries are doing around the world, and generally had a wonderful evening of beauty, song, and fellowship. It was fantastic! Highlights included Pastor Ivo Vobejda from Czech (I love those people!), Andrey Davedyanov reading from Revelation in his native Russian (Man, it sounds cool!), Rev. Anita Carrion (a missionary from South America working in Equatorial Guinea...she was facinating!), and the 22nd Psalm sung with Tabla Drum by some dudes from Pakistan. It was also a momentous occasion as Dr Wilson handed over the reins of Chairman as he retires this year. It was a beautiful evening that made me want to go directly to the airport and GO...somewhere...anywhere.... We'll see what God has planned for me next.

Beauty

2008-06-03T22:20:00.000-07:00

My sweet friend Sheila had a post on her amazing blog "Anam Cara" today that I loved. (I wish I knew how to link that from here) She and her family have just moved into a new home. Now, I know a thing or two about moving, and I know how much STUFF I have accumulated by myself. There are five of them! And half are teenagers. I can't even fathom the work involved in that. And her post today confessed that she walked past all the boxes to plant flowers in the window boxes. I LOVE that she planted flowers before unloading boxes! It speaks volumes about her love of the beauty of God! And puts things into perspective for the rest of us. Which has made me think...

What is truly important in this world? Beauty. What speaks where words fail? Beauty. What heals deep into our souls? Beauty. Where do we find power when we feel weak? Beauty. Think about this for a minute. What do we do when someone is sick in the hospital? (ie. sick and away from home) Send flowers. Why? When someone passes away what do we do for the bereaved? Send flowers. When you find yourself in love, what do you do to show your love? Send flowers. Why do we do this? Because they are beautiful! And the beauty of this part of creation, the perfection of it, heals and conveys love.

And Beauty comes in all forms; Art, Nature, Creation, Music, Words, A Look, A Gesture, A Smile, A Word of Encouragement, Honesty, Time to Rest, Someone thinking of you, Friendship, ...and Flowers in a new home. All Beautiful!

I'd love to hear your list of beautiful things...

Time...

2008-05-30T14:52:00.000-07:00

Why is time so elusive? And when we finally have some, why is it so easily misspent? I am learning just how freakish I am in that I cannot relax, and yet find myself wasting so much time. And maybe that's the problem...I feel like I'm wasting time. I know in my head that God is giving me this time to catch my breath, regroup, ... land. But I am at a complete loss as to what that looks like on a daily basis. And I am unable to relax. I am unorganized, inattentive, languid, flaging, and feeling generally detached. Where is this coming from? I'm not unhappy. I have an amazing feeling of Freedom! But I have no idea what to do with myself now that I am not defined by the spa...with it's 90 hour work weeks and no vacation time.

And I'm not sure when I had time to work. Seriously. There isn't enough time in a day, and I don't do anything! Some days I do. Some days are productive. The house is clean, everything in it's new place, the porch is stained and sparking clean, the flower pots repainted, and yesterday I did take a car load of boxes to a friend's attic. And I've done some hair. But some days are laying in pajamas all day with clutter strewn around me like a derelict tenement.

How do I Land? How do I relax? How do I find balance? And will tomorrow be better? Today I spent 4 hours filling out a job application, then cleaned the house again. I know I need to take the dog for a walk, but here I am in front of the computer again... How do people do this; this not working thing? What is real life like for normal people? And will I ever become one?

Wednesday...

2008-05-14T17:10:00.000-07:00

(sigh). (Bigger sigh). :) Today, I am exhausted. This is the third day of trying to get my house ready to sell. I had no idea just how much crap I really have. The broker came over today and we spent six hours staging, removing, boxing, hauling, cleaning, rearranging, cleaning again, and taking pictures. (which look amazing!) I still need to scrub and repaint the front porch and do some minor landscaping, plus reboxing most of the stuff that got shoved places today. But the good news is, the moment we put the sign in the yard, we had people wanting to see it! Seriously! The neighbor across the street is putting his on the market next week (for $399,000!!!), so he came in to see and we talked about doing our open houses on the same days. Then a realtor was driving by with a client and stopped. It isn't even on the market yet! (And was not clean...clutter just moved from room to room as we staged and took pictures)
It hadn't really hit me until the sign went up in the yard. I mean, sure, I'm putting my house on the market, yada, yada, yada. But it's real now. I may not have a place to live in a few weeks! I mean, I will...but I won't have a place to put all my crap. And there is ALOT of crap. I had a yard sale last week, and did really well...I thought. I need a few more of those. And where will I go? Do I look for a job here? When do I start looking? Where do I start looking?
I know in my head that I will eventually crash. Today, that is getting closer. I'm still too busy right now for that, but I know it's coming. I am just a little freaked out today. Today it's really finally real.

Freedom!

2008-05-08T00:35:00.000-07:00

May 8, 2008; 2:26am

Izabella Day Spa is officially closed. She now lives only in our hearts. All furnishings and fixtures have been removed and, Baby, we stripped that place bare! I am so INCREDIBLY indebted to those brave souls who helped me!!! You guys are AMAZING!! (8 of us did it all, and we couldn't start until the last client was gone at 6pm...thus the late hour now)

I will update on the happenings after I get some rest, but we did not get our buyer. And I'm fine. Right now, in this moment, I'm fine. Because I'm finally free, and I know God has something else for me to do.

Love and blessings on all who have prayed with me over this!! We're not done yet, and God did not fail us!

Izabella Update

2008-05-06T18:08:00.001-07:00

There are so many people hanging on for drops of info, I thought this is the best way to update. (And I am INCREDIBLY grateful for all who are praying and interested!)

Today, May 6:

Business as usual. We had a pretty good day booked, so I wasn't going to turn that down. After David was annointed King as a boy, he went back to the sheep....did the job at hand. The spa was my job at hand today.
The staff was amazing! Of course this kind of blindsided them, but they all said the same thing - they love me, appreciate me, and don't want to work for anyone else. If I go somewhere else, they will go there. Amazing...and humbling. I am so grateful for God giving me confidence and blessings in this way!
I learned quickly that I couldn't really answer the phone. People want to book appointments for later this week, next week, ... I told a few people that we are being purchased by a different company and may be closed for a few weeks during the transition. Then I just let the machine pick up....I can't answer the phone anymore.
The rest of the day was silent. No broker, no bank, no buyers, no Factory. Everyone was silent. I think it was God giving me a break after yesterday. :) At 4:30pm I spoke to the banker. HUGE things!
A) I am NOT responsible to remove the equipment tomorrow night if this buyer doesn't come through!!! WE DON'T HAVE TO MOVE ALL THAT HEAVY CRAP!! This is so huge to me! The bank will get their lawyers involved if they need to, but will coordinate all that with the Factory themselves.
B) I may not have to file bankruptsy even if I don't find a buyer! They are willing to work out some terms for me. "Can you afford $500/month? $250?" He is going to work with the underwriters to find some terms that work for everyone.
C) He isn't excited about me selling my house! "But then you'll have to pay rent somewhere." I'm going to have to talk to Tim and Larry about this.
Who knew these were even possibilities?!

So that's the day! Big stuff, as usual. Tomorrow is business as usual again, and praying I have a buyer by the end of the day.

THANK YOU to all who are praying with me!

Heavy Hearts again

2008-02-07T00:14:00.001-08:00

I have a heavy heart again tonight. A dear friend and much beloved client has had a massive stroke. He has been in the hospital for 15 days and responsiveness is diminishing. They moved him today to a hospice facility and it doesn't look like it's going to be very long before he leaves this world to gaze into the loving eyes of Jesus. Please pray for his family. He and his wife are wonderful believers, but this is painful and shocking. He is in his mid 50's. There are 3 sons...the last one finally in college. Please pray that they don't get stuck in their grief and loss.

Thanksgiving

2008-01-14T16:15:00.000-08:00

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU to all who came by Sunday to help scub Izabella!!! Who knew the rugs are that color?! (thanks heather & trey for bringing the Dyson!...how can I get me one of those?!) I have my hair room and one esthetic room left to do, and then can officially pronounce her "Q-tip clean"!

For those of you who don't know, Izabella is officially up for sale. (I will sign a contract with the broker this week) Last Monday I asked a friend, "How do you sell a business? Where do you go? Where do you list it?". His response, "You find a broker". A what? And where do you find one of those?! Well, if your Sunday School class prays over you, sometimes, on Tues morning, you find the business card of a business broker randomly laying on the floor! Yes folks, that is correct. And doesn't God have a sense of humor?!

I am now in the hectic process of pulling together incredible amounts of paper work as well as getting the place deep cleaned. Many, Many, Many thanks to all 15 people who gave their time and scrubbing (and filing!) abilities to help me get it ready to show! Pray for a buyer! (actually, I've been praying for not just any buyer, but for a Christian buyer) I'd like to see her continue to reflect God.

I'll keep you informed on what happens next...
Should be exciting!

Word on the Street

2008-01-05T09:29:00.000-08:00

It's official. Izabella is not moving. Our wonderful Dr. Feick has found a loophole in our lease he can use. I need his written permission for any improvements I do and he has decided he won't be giving me permission to do my plumbing. Yes, you heard that correctly. I cannot add plumbing. So now it is up to the bank. If I can use some of the construction money to make a few changes here at the Factory and do a massive marketing campaign, we will charge ahead with gusto! But if they decide they have given me enough and no more, I will hold my head proudly as I file bankruptcy and move on. It's actually a good place to be. The whole world is ahead of me, and I can relax knowing that it isn't up to me so I don't have to worry about it. God has something in mind, and I will go where He leads! Glory and Honor will come of this- no matter what the outcome.

Thinking...

2007-12-28T15:40:00.000-08:00

Word today from the bank is that they are freezing all funds until the SBA loan is approved. The SBA usually does not approve loans until construction is complete. December was a good month overall, with gift card sales saving the day at the last minute. Of course, that means January will be redeeming those cards, so I cannot use half the money that came in. Plus we are at the end of the year and need to pay payroll taxes. We won't know what the other bid is for construction until after the first of the year.

With the 'rents back home and roommate gone for a few more days, there is time now to think. Will I use it wisely? What got me on this thinking tangent today was watching some of Matthew West's webumentary about his throat surgery. He had his next few years all planned out. Then God wiped all that away with the words, "You need vocal cord surgery". What happens when all that you thought, all that you planned, and all that you thought your life was going to look like is wiped out? And that is where I find myself today. I thought it was Izabella. And I want it to be Izabella. But in the current form, that plan is not going to live. Something has to change. And I'm quite certain that something is me.

Where do we go from here

2007-12-21T13:15:00.000-08:00

What was the date on that last blog? Dec 8? And we are not building. Not only are we not building, we may not BE building. Oh what an ordeal this has been. Is it worth it? Do I even continue? Lots of people are now telling me, "Iz, bancruptsy isn't so bad"... And, honestly, it isn't. It isn't the end of the world by any means. Heck, if Dave Ramsey can do it...

Just to fill you in, since the last post I've been given the final bid for buildout and it is WAY overbudget. Literally double what I had anticipated and planned for. That same day my Yoga instructor announced she is pregnant and not willing to be involved anymore. Within days, the bank announced they are not releasing any more funds until we are building. And if we don't build, there will be no more money.

So there you have it. I am surprisingly, with God's grace, calm. And trying to sit long enough to figure out what the goal is. What is it that I want? Truely, what do I want? The possibilities are endless...

Izabella Update

2007-12-08T22:25:00.000-08:00

For those of you who are interested in all that is Izabella...
The architectural drawings are FINALLY AT CODES! Of course, there is no date to hope for actually getting our approval. This has been the most difficult lessons in continually crawling back onto the alter. Lots of days, multiple times during the day, I must make a conscious effort to let go of my expectations on timing. God's mind is so far beyond mine... But there IS finally tangible progress.

It is facinating to me how much God must have in mind for this new space. For all these long months fighting with the City over parking, there has been a lull. Waiting. It's almost like all of heaven has been holding it's breath. We've all been in a holding pattern. And now that there is finally forward momentum, all hell has broken loose again. The enemy is back to wageing a full on assalt.

New landlord has decided he wants to ignore the fact that we have a signed lease. He has been showing the property. And yesterday he wanted me to sign a different lease...and destroy the old one. It was an amazing exchange really. From me searching and finding at the very last minute the original lease; to he with that document in his hand screaming he had to destroy it... And no, I am not exagerating there. He was screaming. Waving it in his hand, "I have to destroy this one! You can't have this! You can't have this!" Looking back on it all I can say is, "Wow. God MUST have something BIG planned!" Because the enemy would not be this violent otherwise. And how utterly bizarre. A self professed Christian man, business owner, doctor...waving my lease in the air, screaming at me. But as God had found that lease mere minutes before, I was not backing down! Rational. Calm. Firm. All the things I had prayed for before I walked into his office. God is so amazing! How I got out of there with the original is ONLY a God thing! Miracle. Nothing short of miraculous.

And so we wait. But may be able to start loading in materials next week! (should I let myself be excited yet?)

Waiting

2007-11-30T17:53:00.000-08:00

I'm reading a book called "Heaven" by Randy Alcorn. HIGHLY recommend this book! Here's a concept that is amazing to me:

Rev 6:9-11
When the Lamb opened the fifth seal, I saw under the altar the souls of those who had been slain because of the word of God and the testimony they had maintained. They called out in a loud voice, 'How long, Sovereign Lord, holy and true, until you judge the inhabitants of the earth and avenge our blood?' Then each of them was given a white robe, and they were told to wait a little longer, until the number of their fellow servants and brothers who were to be killed as they had been was completed."

From this passage of three short verses, Mr. Alcorn summizes 21 brief observations concerning heaven. 21! You'll have to get the book and read them for yourself. (there is much more to the book than just these 21 things, by the way) But here is one that hit me over the head:

"God promises to fulfill the martyrs' requests, but says they will have to "wait a little longer" (v.11). Those in the present Heaven live in anticipation of the future fulfillment of God's promises. ...

There is time in the present Heaven (vv.10-11). The white-robed martyrs ask God a time-dependent question: "How long, Sovereign Lord...until you judge the inhabitants of the earth and avenge our blood?" (v.10) They are aware of time's passing and are eager for the coming day of the Lord's judgement. God answers that they must "wait a little longer" until certain events transpire on Earth. Waiting requires the passing of time."

Can you imagine? You're in Heaven. In the presence of God. Able to ask Him questions, sit down with Him and have a chat. You see the preparations and building going on for the New Earth and New Jerusalem. Maybe you're even involved with the building project. You know first hand what is coming and how INCREDIBLY AMAZING it is going to be with our new bodies, living in a new world for all eternity...and you still have to wait? Knowing all that!?

Why do I EVER complain about waiting?

Patience

2007-11-03T10:09:00.000-07:00

It is always amazing to me how I usually THINK I know something about life/God/holiness and then one day out of nowhere I really GET it and think, "What was I thinking before?!"

I have given my life to God. Given Him my issues and things I'm dealing with, laid myself and those things on the alter, and been conscious of not crawling back off of it. I thought I knew what that meant and I did what I envisioned that looks like. But today is different...

In my weakness this week, I have been unable to move. So I've prayed. Not that I haven't been praying all along. I have. And I've laid my junk on the alter, and "let God take it". ... I've said all those words we're taught to say, and I've really meant them as I've prayed. But I finally laid down in exhaustion and admited my weakness. "Okay God. You know what needs to happen here. I know change has to happen, but I don't know how. I just don't really know what that looks like. So how would You handle it? What would you do in my situation, Jesus?" And then I put the issue out of the 'every moment' rotation in my mind. And God showed up! It wasn't immediately, but after a few weeks of me being conscious of not being conscious about it...God opened a door I could never have imagined.

And here's what I learned: Think of God as being on "Island time". We in America want everything to be RIGHT NOW! And even though we pray for patience, we want that right now, too. But what about life in other countries? A friend just got back from a month in Italy and said, "I love how laid back it is there!" Life is at a totally different pace outside of America. Why do we rush? There are countries in this world who take 3 hour naps every afternoon. Shops and businesses close, and everyone just relaxes for a while. Other countries have 6 weeks of vacation every year...manditory. Six weeks! And I have worked 6 days a week/12 hours a day for 2 years, with that 7th day being filled with laundry, errands, and everything that there isn't time for. Why? There is a REASON God declared a Sabbath. We are CREATED for a day of rest. To take one day and wake up without an alarm...curl up in a plush place and read for hours...turn on some music and do a leisurely art project...lay on the sofa in front of a movie...eat popcorn for lunch, cereal for dinner and do no cooking all day...spend a whole day RESTING mind, body, and spirit.

But here in America, we work 5 or 6 days like crazed people, spend all day Saturday running the kids to sports events, and then on Sunday rush out the door to church where we keep looking at our watches, anxious to beat the crowd to lunch, then spend the day wrangling kids and laundry and housework after which we collapse into bed just to start the whole process over again.

God doesn't work like like that. He does His work leisurely, then sits back to enjoy it. Does it say in Genesis that God was frantically creating until He collapsed? No. He spoke. And it was good. Then He spoke again. And it was good. And when He was finished, He sat back and had a MaiTai. (okay, so it doesn't specifically say mai tai, but you get the picture)

What would happen if we all stopped running rampant and lived "on Island time"? Picture it in your mind...A hammock on a deserted beach, fruity beverage and good book in hand, sun sinking slowly on the horizon... . Are you there? Guess where God lives? Yeah...There. Enjoying His creation. So what would your life be like if you walked at that pace for awhile? Would everything fall apart? No. Because God is holding you in the palm of His hand. You're not going to fall. Just relax. Take a deep breath. Now let it out... Take another breath... Aaahhhhh... Yeah...that's it.

Burning Bridges

2007-10-20T13:45:00.000-07:00

This is a quote from my amazingly talented-writer neice, about burning bridges. I thought it ties in nicely with the search for joy.

"Here's the match. It fizzeles against the night, glowing off the water. A snap. It caught, racing against the stars. It burns, the clouds above glow orange against the black of night. There is no rain. It smolders, the flame dies down. It buckles and caves against some invisible malicious hand, then falls gracefully into the depths. A splash, some falling ash. It's gone; it's done. The bridge is burned, no more to stand so high and lofty against the sky. It's gone. What was once so proud, reduced to this. A mis-shapen back under the water, not a ripple to mark it's name."

And then what happens to joy when a bridge in relationship is burned? What happens to our joy while it's smoldering? And although I am by no means responsible for the joy of others, what happens to the joy of that person with whom I've burned the bridge?

I only ask because there is a bridge I want to burn. I long to burn it. I need to burn it. Okay, so maybe not burn the bridge...but I need to make changes to the bridge. It needs a toll booth. Less accessability. And it is SO DIFFICULT making those changes...It seems easier to just burn the thing down. And yet, once again, the easy way isn't the right way.

In Search of Joy

2007-10-16T16:47:00.000-07:00

I recieved a letter from John Eldredge today. Yes, he writes to me personally every month. So maybe he sends the same letter to 15,000 people across the country, but it is always just for me. I'm not sure why he even bothers with postage to all those other people...it's always just for me.

Let me quote:
"A few years ago a woman with a sensitive spirit and a keen eye for what God is up to pulled me aside to offer this warning: "The battle in your life is against your joy." It hit me like a Mac truck.
But of course. Suddenly, life made sense.

... (there's alot here. Ask me to read the whole letter sometime. It's really good, but you know how wordy John can be) ...

"Really now - how much do you think about joy? Do you see it as essential to your life, something God insists on?"

...(he explains in his vivid way a fabulous day here) ...

"It was an incredible day. One of those rare and glorious days that become, over time, the icon of summer vacation... So - why didn't I wake with a joyful heart the next day? Joy was just here. Where did it go? ...Now I begin to realize I haven't even given ten minutes to joy, let alone pursued it as essential to my life."

And there it is... Have I even given ten minutes to joy, let alone pursued it as ESSENTIAL TO MY LIFE? And thus, the quest to get my stress level down to a managable level...

Tomorrow's Celebration

2007-09-14T09:30:00.000-07:00

If you can please pray for us. Although tomorrow will be an amazing celebration of a fantastic life, we are expecting close to 1,000 people to come to the services. That will be alot of tears and hugs and well wishes, but will be taxing on Sharyl. Please lift her up, she needs some strength. She is actually doing really well, but has had a hard morning today. Services will be at 1pm tomorrow.

Today's paper

2007-09-14T09:29:00.000-07:00

John A. Patton
PATTON, John A.
Age 60, of Hilltop Drive in Corning, NY, died Friday, September 7, 2007, at home. John was born in Hornell, NY, on January 8, 1947 to John and Mary (Campbell) Patton, Sr. He served his country during Vietnam in the Air Force in the Special Forces in search and rescue. He married Sharyl Strunk in 1990 in Vestal, NY. He was employed by the Town of Greece as a Property Assessor. John was a past President of the Chemung County Chapter of the New York State Assessors Association and member of New York State Assessors Association. He was an active member of Victory Highway Wesleyan Church. John's favorite job description was Grandpa. He is survived by his wife, Sharyl; his mother, Mary Blake of Palmyra, NY; two sons, Chad (Laurie) Patton of Endicott and Taylor Hill of Endicott; one sister, Roxanne (George) Kachel of Palmyra; three grandsons, Ethan Emery, Jonathan Patton, and Cameron Patton; mother-in-law, Laura Jean Strunk of Endicott; sisters-in-law, Carol (Martin) Loefstedt of Oxford, Billie Taylor of Endicott, Ruth (Michael) Odom of Wake Forest, NC, and Bobbi (Thomas) Krause of Holly Springs, NC; and several nieces and nephews. Calling hours will be held on Saturday, September 15, 2007, from 1-4 p.m. at Victory Highway Wesleyan Church, 150 Victory Highway, Painted Post, where memorial services follow at 4:00 p.m. with Pastor Paul Piraino officiating. Philippians 3:12-14, Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made in John's name to the Central New York District of the Wesleyan Church, 6800 Voorhies Lane, Liverpool, NY 13088. Phillips Funeral Home & Cremation Service in Corning has been entrusted with arrangements.

My heart is bleeding

2007-09-12T15:59:00.000-07:00

My heart is bleeding today. This man and his wife are 'home' to me. She is in Ukraine and can't get home until tonight. Please pray for this family! I will be in NY until further notice...

Meaghan M. McDermott
Staff writer

(September 12, 2007) — Greece Town Assessor John A. Patton was found dead in his Corning home yesterday.

Kathryn Firkins, director of constituent services for Greece, said today that town officials became concerned about Patton’s well-being on Monday when he failed to show up for work after a week-long vacation.

Town officials made repeated attempts to contact him on Monday. When he did not arrive at work on Tuesday, they contacted state police.

Patton, 60, joined the town of Greece in November 2005 after previously working in Horseheads, Chemung County, a town of 19,500 people. From 1987 to 1993, he served as a part-time assessor for the town of Orange in Schuyler County. He lived in Corning and commuted to Greece.

Officials said it appears Patton died of natural causes.

“All of us at the town of Greece are shocked and deeply saddened by John’s passing,” said Supervisor John Auberger. “We are a close organization and the loss of one of our members weighs heavily on all of us.”

Beach: Day 1

2007-09-04T17:25:00.000-07:00

I arrived at 12:30am Sunday morning. Yes, I had been up early to speak at the “Women on the Way” event early Sat morning, packed and been in the car for nearly 13 hours. When I finally did arrive I decided that I MUST go stick my feet in the sand, RIGHT NOW. I must! So 3 of us set off walking the few short blocks to the ocean from our condo. (which, by the way, is nearly 6,000sf!) GLORIOUS! Moonlight on the water, warm breeze, even warmer water … it just doesn’t get better than that.

On our walk home, we heard a noise behind us and turned to see a man on a bicycle coming towards us. Immediately he began, “Hey baby! I LOVE you, Baby!” and then proceeded to pour filth out of his mouth. He stopped along side us and we ordered him to leave us alone and kept walking. Mind you, it is 3:30am, there is not another soul around at this hour, we are in a strange place, and no one really knows where we are. (do you think I was afraid?) He got off his bike and tried to grab me. But as I was not drunk and he was, I was able to get away from him. Again, ordering him to leave us alone was not stopping the tirade of obscenities and indescribable filth coming out of his mouth. Just as we were getting close to our condo and deciding we needed to run past it so he wouldn’t know where we “live”, a policeman “happened” to come driving down the street. God is amazing in his protection of his girls!! Talk about divine timing! The officer was incredibly friendly and stayed with us until we felt safe. Another officer also came up and they assured us there is very little crime here, we just happen to be renting in one of the worst neighborhoods. Great. Now we know why we got such a great deal on the place! But we are now armed with private police numbers that will get officers here faster than going through 911. There is nothing like being accosted and then having the police give you a private number. A little peace of mind.

When we got back into the house we, of course, had to catch up on all our lives and sat up talking until 5:45am. At that hour, you realize you MUST go back to the beach to see the sunrise! As far as sunrises go, it was less than spectacular. But nonetheless, any sunrise on the beach is fantastic! The waves dancing along the shoreline, the light increasing in intensity, rays of yellow overlaid on the blues and oranges, … Beautiful. We stood in the water singing old hymns as the majesty unfolded. Does it get better than that?

As we got back to the car (you thought we would walk again?) Nanc made a comment about the neighborhood looking like Trinidad and 30 seconds later when we looked down the road again, a truck was overturned. What?! Yes, a pickup truck was overturned in the middle of the road where just 30 seconds earlier had been just road. (and it's great to know, by the way, that South Carolina looks like a third world country!) We ran to see if we could help. A pregnant woman had run a stop sign and hit a drunk driver. Ironic, no? You could smell the alcohol on that guy from 4 feet away. Everyone seemed fine, just shaken up, but we waited until the rescue crews arrived. Of course, she with no driver's license and he drunk out of his mind at 6am, neither of them wanted the police called. :) "Your truck is upside down in the middle of the road...You hit the steering wheel with your pregnant belly...the police have to come."

So within 12 hours of arriving in Myrtle Beach we have met 4 police officers, an ambulance crew, and the fire rescue team. There is no shortage of excitement so far… I’m curious to see what tomorrow will bring.

Vacation?

2007-09-04T17:22:00.000-07:00

These are excerpts from the "vacation". You decide if it was worth the 12 hour drive...

Journey to…

Vacation AT LAST!!! 8 Glorious days of sand, sun, and my 4 of my best girlfriends from home…does it get better than that?! No agenda, no schedule, no meetings, no stress, no pressure, no thoughts, no emotional or business rollercoaster, …. AAAaaahhhhh.

I’ve never been to Myrtle Beach for more than a few hours, so this truly is a new adventure. Somewhere entirely new to explore and learn! I decided as I drove that since I’ve never been this direction before that I should stop along the way and see the things I’ve not experienced before.  So off the highway I went. Pigeon Forge, Gaitlinburg, and the Great Smokey Mountain National Park. Sounds fabulous, right? I have to admit some disappointment. It was beautiful, don’t get me wrong. Just not what it had been built up to be. I’m sure that if I had put in some serious hiking time I would feel differently, but it just didn’t seem like somewhere entirely new. Do you know what I mean? Yes, gorgeous, but nothing really earth shattering. I would love to hike some of the Appalachian Trail sometime to change my mind about it all. But I’m not really pressed… Maybe the fact that my little detour added 3 ½ hours onto an already 9 hour drive had something to do with it, too.  And I am sure that if I had done the mountains before going through the dreadful tourist traps that Pigeon Forge and Gaitlinburg are, I would have a vastly different view as well.

But that’s why they call it an adventure…you don’t know what to expect until you get there!

Shutting down...

2007-08-22T15:56:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, you just need to shut down. I think that's where I'm at. I'm headed to the beach this Saturday for a whole glorious week of sun and sand...HALLELUJAH! I cannot even express in words how desperately I need to be away. 8 Glorious days of pool, beach, bed, book(s), and more beach. Long walks with God. Four of my best girlfriends from NY who are also in desperate need of serious down time. Private pool. Kitchen on site. Restaurants down the block. No agenda. No agenda. No agenda. GLORIOUS! Did I use the words desperately needed? :) I've stocked up on some great reading material..."Hearing God" by Dallas Willard, "Contrarian's Guide to knowing God", and the new one from Brennan Manning on Faith. Oh, and Carly Fiorina's book that I picked up at the Leadership Summit. Can't wait to finish them all!

What's sad is how much I need to accomplish before I go...and how much will just not happen before then. C'est la vie. What I can procrastinate will either go away on it's own, or wait until I return. God knows how I am, and He will accomplish through me just what He needs to this week. The rest is shutting down now in preparation. I am hoping to return ready to battle again. There is a long road ahead....

Faith ain't easy...

2007-08-15T15:56:00.000-07:00

A few days ago as I put in my counter-counter offer on the "big space", I said to God, "If they come back with x amount, I will KNOW that you want me to jump off this very big cliff and I WILL do it!" Today I learned that they came back with $15,000 less than x amount. Of course. Because it's about walking with God and having communication with Him. I heard that recently, and now it makes perfect sense. "You have a good heart and long to do God's will. If He TOLD you what to do, you would DO it! But He wants you to listen to Him, walk with Him, commune with Him, ... So He doesn't tell you everything." Doh! (and thank you John Eldredge!)

In running numbers again today, I am discouraged. On all of it...not just the "big space". But I also know that I pushed the enemy last night in another matter, and today, he's just pushing back. So I will suck up my discouragment and have a conversation with God. Oh, and I bought a new book today I'm going to recommend to us all..."Hearing God" by Dallas Willard. Maybe we should read it together... :)

Wheeeeeee

2007-08-08T16:45:00.000-07:00

That's the sound you make on a rollercoaster...up over another huge hill, plunging down towards earth again.

The Bank met me at the huge space on Monday morning. They loved it, but her words to me were..."Iz, you and your hairbrained ideas...!" Then the questioning of how to staff such a huge space... And that remains my underlying concern as well. Can I staff it with enough of the right people to keep true to the vision? The projections looked amazing...IF the current lease owner will pay the buildout costs. Today, I learned they counter-offered half. That's not quite a deal breaker, but I am planning to stick to my guns and see if they will come up a little more. I say this because...

Yesterday the phone rang. Small builing owner calling to tell me he's done some digging. He personally went to all the tenants of the strip next door to ask about our parking issue. It seems we have been misled. Only ONE tenant did not agree to it. Everyone else is fine. No problem. Yes, to the parking issue! And so here we are again, whirling through the air. Up another hill, stomach in the throat, cresting the top to plunge to earth again.

And now, the $64,000 question: Do we stay with the program and go into a space that is SO workable and easily staffed, should be profitable within 4 or 5 months, but with no room to expand and grow? Or do we Jump off the cliff again, and go for the HUGE space that has room to encompass the whole dream and then some, but may be difficult to staff and not turn a profit for at least a year? (but would have the $$ to float that long...)

As I see it in black and white, it seems like a silly question... But my heart does always yearn for more... :)

update

2007-08-04T12:53:00.000-07:00

Well, we're still a no go on the original location to move to. I am still amazed that it has fallen through.

I finally broke down and called the bank to tell them. They will meet me here in Franklin on Monday morning. I am working on projections for the huge space, and will present it to them then. Wanted to do that IN the space, so they can get a feel for it. It's so different to be standing there looking at all that will be going on around that location than to be in an office downtown looking at it strictly on paper. I'm hoping they'll catch the bug! Am also hoping I can actually afford it! (Am still working on the projections.) It would be huge, that's for sure. 5 massage rooms, 3 esthetics, 7 or 8 hair chairs, and space for photography studio or yoga classes. That's alot! Can I really do this? Is God really calling me to dream/think bigger? Will he provide me enough of the right staff?

And so the faith walk continues...

The hugeness of God's dreaming...

2007-07-28T13:33:00.000-07:00

I am in the midst, today, of planning space. Draft paper out, sharpened pencils, floor plan in front of me... and I am torn in my emotions. I had everything finally figured out. A great building, signed lease (with an amazing deal!), loan approved for build out, builder hired, and everything on 'Go'. I have blueprints, and can see it all in my mind...the colors of the rooms, the hue of the wood flooring, even where the flower arrangements go and what they look like... I have an amazing visual in 'me wee noggin'. And in the blink of an eye, all that is puffed away. Merely a vapor.

The first time I peered in the windows of the new, new space I felt like God whispered to me. "You're not dreaming big enough." So here I am working out the floorplan of a building I cannot afford by myself. And wondering who God is going to bring into this picture to share the space with me. It is a curious feeling...at once excited and optimistic, yet full of trepedation and wonder. Trust is a difficult place to live. And yet, I cannot live any other way! Without trust, there is truly nothing worth living for. And so I will go back to my planning. Where will this trail lead? I know not...

Keeping up with Izabella

2007-07-26T09:46:00.000-07:00

So, I'm thinking that the best way to keep everyone updated on the miraculous happenings around Izabella Day Spa and Salon is to do it here. :) That way, everyone can just come to one happy place to find the info they crave.

I have a meeting in the morning at a new location possibility with the leasing agent and my architect. (did you hear me say, "my architect"?! What a huge miracle that is!) We are to go through the site, measuring and dreaming up possibilities. This location will only be do-able if I can find the right people (ministry or photographer) to rent some of the gi-normous space that is there. AND, if we can work out how to make it all flow.

I'll update again soon...

2007-07-14T16:15:00.000-07:00

I find spiritual battle so interesting. How relentless it is. The relentless pursuit of evil.
This week has been such a battling week. Two nights I did not sleep a single wink. Not a single moment was I actually asleep. Praying, crying out, battling for friends and loved ones... . (That, of course, alternates with praying for God to either let me sleep or let me die.) :) And yet the night wears on and the battle rages. The nights between those battles I was asleep like the dead. No dreams, no movement, and nearly unable to wake. It seems so odd to alternate like that. I'm curious to see what tonight will bring.

This week has also seen a spiritual battlefield with the spa. Miracle one day, set back the next. Another miracle, followed by set back. And I find it so facinating (and somewhat encouraging in a weird way) that the morning after a 5 hour battling prayer session in the night I got the latest set back. Here we are 8 weeks into the process of blueprints and such, and NOW I'm told there isn't enough parking at the new site. And if I can't convince the owner of the strip mall next door to write a letter stating that A) he has enough parking to let us use 15 spaces of his lot, and B) that he actually will let us use them, then the whole project is kaput. Done. Over. Never to happen in this location. Don't you find that facinating that those words came 2 days after a miracle (an architect will redo my blueprints for free!), and the morning after my second sleepless-prayer-battling night? Me thinks it no coincidence!

I would love to hear if any of you guys have experienced some tug-of-war like this. Let's hear some battle stories to encourage each other!

Fighting for the King!
IzaBELLA, Warrior Princess

2007-07-13T13:52:00.001-07:00

Came across this today and thought you all need to hear this truth, too. I'll try to be posting more often. Okay, I'm going to be posting more often. :)
Thanks for letting me take such a long hiatus.

		July 13, 2007
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Nancy Leigh DeMoss

Fill Your Mind with Truth:

An excerpt from Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free

by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

Be on Your Guard

Deception in advertising appeals to our natural human longings. We want to believe that somehow, mysteriously, those unwanted pounds really could melt away in just ten minutes-no sweat, no discipline, no cost, no effort, no pain. That's why we buy the pills, the diet drink powders, and the exercise equipment sold on infomercials.

A clever and cunning pitchman whose intention was to change Adam and Eve's thinking about God and His ways designed the first advertising campaign. Satan's objective was to drive a wedge between God and His creatures. He rightly assumed that the man and woman were not likely to support anything that appeared to be an all-out assault on God. He knew that, instead, he would have to subtly trick them, to deceive them, to seduce them by making an offer that appeared to be reasonable, desirable, and not entirely "anti-God."

Satan deceived Eve through a clever combination of outright lies, half-truths, and falsehoods disguised as truth. He began by planting seeds of doubt in her mind about what God had actually said ("Did God really say ...?" [Genesis 3:1]). Next he led her to be careless with the word of God and to suggest that God had said something that, in fact, He had not said. God had said, "Do not eat the fruit of the tree." However, Eve quoted God as saying, "You must not touch it" (v. 3, italics added). Satan deceived Eve by causing her to question the goodness, love, and motives of God.

From that moment to this, Satan has used deception to win our affections, influence our choices, and destroy our lives. In one way or another, every problem we have in this world is the fruit of deception-the result of believing something that simply isn't true. Satan holds out the glittering promise of "real life"; he knows, however, that those who respond to his offer will certainly die (Proverbs 14:12).

So why do we fall for his deception? Why do we go for the lure? One reason is that Satan doesn't usually appear in the form of a serpent- instead, he comes disguised as a New York Times best-seller, a popular magazine, or a movie, or a TV show, or a Top Ten hit song. He may also pose as a relative or friend giving sincere counsel, a therapist, or even a Christian writer, preacher, or counselor.

Regardless of the immediate source, anytime we receive input that is not consistent with the Word of God we can be sure Satan is trying to deceive and destroy us. What we read or hear may sound right, may feel right, may seem right-but if it is contrary to the Word of God, it isn't right. If we could only see that the forbidden fruit, fruit that looks so ripe and tastes so sweet in the first moment, always leads ultimately to death and destruction. Deception was-and still is-crucial to Satan's strategy. According to Jesus, it is the devil's very nature to deceive: [The devil] was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.

Sadly, most people-even Christians-have unthinkingly exposed themselves to so much deception that they do not even realize they are being deceived. That is the very nature of deception-it blinds us to the fact that we have been deceived.

One of my goals in this book is to urge Christian women to open their eyes and begin to evaluate what is going on around them-to wake up to the deception that is so pervasive in both our secular and our Christian cultures. So much of our lifestyle is rooted in ways of thinking that simply are not true. The result is a house built on sinking sand. One lie leads to another and another and another.

Unfortunately, most people mindlessly accept whatever they hear and see. We listen to music, read books and magazines, watch movies, listen to advice, and respond to advertisements without asking ourselves important questions:

• "What is the message here?"

• "Is it really true?"

• "Am I being deceived by a way of thinking that is contrary to the Truth?"

The forbidden fruit was "good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom" (v. 6, italics added). If it hadn't seemed so attractive, do you think Eve would have fallen for the offer? If that fruit had been rotten and crawling with worms, would she have considered disobeying God? Of course not. What makes Satan's offers so alluring and so deceptive is that they look so right.

The problem is that Eve didn't stop to evaluate what was really happening. She didn't take time to discern truth from error. She didn't stop to consider the cost and the consequences of what she was about to do. If Eve could have imagined the ugly, painful, deadly consequences of her choice-in her own life, in her relationship with God, in her marriage, in her children, in her children's children, and (through the sin of her husband, who followed her) in every human being that would ever live on the planet-do you think she would have listened to Satan's lie and disobeyed God? I doubt it.

But we have precisely the same problem. I have discovered that very few Christians seriously consider the consequences of their choices. We simply live our lives, responding to the people, circumstances, and influences around us-eating what we crave at the moment, buying the newest gadget advertised on TV, adopting the latest fads, and embracing the lifestyles, values, and priorities of our friends. It all looks so good; it feels so right; it seems so innocent. But we end up in abusive relationships, head over heels in debt, angry, frustrated, trapped, and overwhelmed. We have been deceived. We have fallen for a lie.

On the Mountain

2006-09-23T09:31:00.000-07:00

Wed, Sept 13

Have just climbed Whiteface Mountain. From the Castle to the top the last 1/5 mile climbs 26 stories across open rockface. It is raining, 43 degrees, there is zero visibility, and they closed the trail just behind me. "You can't climb today, Ma'am, it's too dangerous." I climbed.

Up was arduous. Wind gusts that nearly sent me sailing off this mountain, rain pelting me in the face, being able to see only a few feet in front of me...I climbed with JOY! Excitement! THIS is an adventure!

At the top, completely out of breath, desperate for water, and dizzy from the heartrate and alltitude, I strolled around inside the weather station that is there, taking is all in. Grateful for the shelter from the storm. A shelter at the top of a difficult climb. That's what this time here in NY feels like. Shelter after a difficult time.

Now I have a choice...climb back down, or take the elevator from the weather station. I decide to climb. Up was tough, but down will be easy.

At the top of the trail there is no wind at all. No rain. Only silence as I begin my decent. It feels like all of heaven is holding it's breath. I have felt God's presence here. Felt Him challenging me on the way up. "Are you up for this, Izi? Are you sure? Is your attitude still of excitement and joy?" Now it feels like God steps back a little. Watching to see what happens, and giving the enemy permission for just a little...

I only get a few hundred yards before the rain. The huge granite bolders I am climbing down become like an ice rink. I slip. But there is a handrail at this section. I grab it in time. Now, this is a flat rock with just a gentle slope downward...it doesn't seem dangerous! But had that handrail not been there, I would have hurt myself.

As I continue down this mountain, the wind begins again. Near 10 mph sustained with gusts to 40mph. (I looked at the data in the weather station.) I get to a crook in the trail just as a gust hits, but I am behind and below a huge rock...the wind doesn't touch me. A cleft in the rock has new meaning. I am comforted by this. Just further there is another smooth section. "Oh, I can relax a little here", I think. Loosen up a little. Let down my guard. This will be easy. I slip. Again, the handrail is there! This time, had it not been there, I would have plummeted to my death. I do not let go of the rail again! And thankfully, because of the difficulty of this section, there is handrail for that whole 1/5 mile stretch. Others before me must have come close to sailing off this mountain, too. The handrail is cold and wet. My gloves are dripping. Merely making a fist releases a stream. But my hands are not cold. Not as frozed as they would be without them. My rain parka is soaked...but I am dry. And all but my face is warm. I am fully protected in the midst of incredible danger.

I continue down, with my hand on the rail. There is one more section where I slip again. But my hand is firmly on the rail and I do not fall.

This is my God. Challenging me to take the hard way...confident I am up for the journey. Testing my will, my determination, and my joy along the way. Inviting me into adventure! Am I still excited?

At the top, He is my shelter from the storm that rages outside. Howling cold rain, zero visibility. He is warmth and shelter.

When the enemy attacks me, He is my handrail. Right beside me the whole way, whether I choose to hang onto His hand is my choice. If I don't, I may fall, but because He is there I will not plummett to my death. There are three different levels to the railing...if I am tall, short, or crawling...the rail is at my level.

He is my parka, hat, and gloves. Wrapping me in warmth and protection the whole way. Again, it is my choice to wear these things or take them off. (to my own misery if I do.)

Thank you, Adonai, for creating this mountain, being here with me, and speaking to me so lovingly! Thank you for being my protection against the weather the enemy throws at me.

A New York State of MInd...

2006-09-20T16:34:00.000-07:00

I'm going to try to blog this most recent and amazing journey...it'll take a few days, so check back often. I'll start at the beginning...

I had two weddings to attend in New York. Home! The events were scheduled a week apart so, darn, I have to stay a whole week with my dearest friends! ;) But as the time neared, it could not have felt like a worse time to go. I seriously considered calling the brides to say, "I know you've said you won't get married unless I do your hair and makeup, but...I can't come. Sorry." Definately not what a bride wants to hear days before the day she's been planning her whole life. But everything in my life felt in chaos. I'd just ended a month-long stretch with only 2 days off, the business is struggling, I'm trying to find investors, had just returned from some business classes, we have a new marketing plan to implement immediately, ...everything needs to be done NOW. And I have to go away?

The day before I was scheduled to drive up, Bride #1 called. "I'm worried about you, honey. I'm worried about you driving all the way up here when you're so exhausted and stressed. There's a plane ticket waiting at the airport for you tomorrow morning." Wait. What?! I cried. "And you can drive my car while you're here...I won't need it." That is a true and wonderful friend! I know I really do need to go. I need to get away.

Okay, so let's rethink packing, and I'll need a book to read on the plane. I went to the bookshelf. Ah, Max Lucado is an easy read! On the plane, I open the book. ("When God Whispers Your Name") I open to a chapter about Jesus going to the wedding in Cana. Yes, I said Jesus going to a wedding. Yes, I was going to a wedding.

Why would Jesus go to a wedding? He had just come out of 40 days in the wilderness being tempted, tested, tried, and tormented. He was exhausted. And the ministry was just beginning. Everything felt like it needed to be done right now! There was so much to do. Why would he go? To have fun. To relax and enjoy himself. Jesus went because he was invited. And God spoke to me... "Iz, I know you are stressed about being away. It feels like everything needs to be done this second, and you don't know where to begin. Go. Relax. REST. And rest in Me. I have it all under control."

My Amazing God...

Remember Me

2006-08-05T12:14:00.000-07:00

Last night I had a very humbling experience. I'm doing a photo shoot on Sunday, and the artist called me in a panic. He'd gone to his regular hairdresser for a simple change, and had come out way too dark and really red. So he went back for her to fix it, and it was lighter, but still way too red. Of course, NOW you come to Iz. ;) (I will fix anyone else's mistakes...and you'll know next time to call me first!) When he got here, his hair wasn't red...it was purple! Not a good color anyday, but especially 2 days before shooting your CD cover. He was gonna be here awhile... .

He sat down in my chair and, since we don't know each other well, asked me my story. ... Those of you who know me well know that isn't a quick thing. But, we're gonna be here awhile anyway, so why not? No holds barred, you asked, so here it is with all the goo. Two and a half hours later, his hair is a great rich coffee color with creamy highlights, and I am humbled.

I have been so stressed about my life and what's going on in it...on the edge of freak out, really feeling the spiritual battle raging on around me. And I've not been fighting well. Really wrestling with God over what He's doing (or seeming lack thereof) and how He's doing it. I know He CAN do things He's promised, but it isn't happening! I've been bitter, angry, and frustrated. Believing the enemy tell me God is holding out on me. As I cleaned up after my new friend left, it hit me. My story. I heard my own words, telling my whole story. It's been a long time since I've told it all like that. And it is so undeniable how God has saved me, and carried me, and been faithful to me, ... I shouldn't BE here! There are so many things in my life that should have killed me...how did I even survive to this point except that God has a plan and a purpose for this life! How can I even begin to doubt that He isn't going to get me through the step I'm in now? It's amazing, really, how like an ancient Israelite I am. God does a spectacular miracle to save me, and 10 min later I'm in trouble again, whining about something else. What's up with that? So I'm humbled by my own words. My own story. It really is spectacular...and it's all God. He has a plan, and He's gonna see me through.

When is the last time you heard your own story? Remind yourself what God has done in your life. Dwell on the miracles. It'll make your present struggle seem less scary.

Read my mind

2006-07-25T10:30:00.000-07:00

I listened to an interesting conversation a few nights ago on the issue of demonic ability to mind read. The premise is the belief that satan and his demons cannot read our minds, but that they can read us well. That they have human nature down so well, they just know how to get to us. The argument for this belief is that they are not omniscient. Only God is omniscient.

Here are my thoughts, and I'd love to hear yours:
Omniscience is not ESP. It is the knowing of everything all at the same time through all history and future...not just knowing what's going on in our tiny minds at any given time. It does include the ability to know our every thought, but not just mine...everyone's at every time through the whole world at the same time. Whew. That makes me tired just thinking about it. And so glad I serve a God so HUGE!

It is my belief that demons do not have this ability. They are not omniscient. But that does not mean they don't know my thoughts! We, being electrical beings, have lots of ways we communicate...not just through words or body language. There is so much about our natural world that we still do not know or understand.

There is a man named David John Oates who has studied what he's dubbed 'reverse speach' for about 20 years now. His findings are that we communicate on a sub-conscious level that can actually be recorded, but you aren't necessarily aware of it. Have you even met someone new and just "clicked" with them.... Knowing intuitively what they were going to say next? His theory is that we have communication on an electromagnetic level. (you can look at his website for more info )

There are other researchers out there that are close to being able to extract sound from inanimate objects. Say in a murder investigation, being able to extract sounds/language/conversations from the table or chairs...from the walls, to help in solving crimes. I'm not making this up, folks...it's out there. (That idea brings new meaning to the scriptures that talk about even the rocks giving praise to God. )

There are scientists that are discovering our "laws" of gravity are not as true and concrete as we'd thought. I have personally participated in experiments that defy gravity as we know it. I am a 5'2", 130# woman and have personally lifted a 6'6" giant of a man to shoulder level with 2 fingers! (ask me about this sometime...I'd love to teach you how to do it)

My point being, there is SO MUCH about this world and the "laws of nature" that we do not understand! So why do we think for a moment that the only way we communicate is through speech, and that satanic forces cannot pick up on our other ways of it? Here's the thing, folks, 90% of the spiritual attacks in my life happen inside my head. If they could not "read my thoughts" and only my body language, I would not have spiritual attack. I often rebuke the enemy inside my head, and they flee. Sure, it's more effective if you shout out loud to them...but not necessary. No, they are not omniscient, but they do speak languages of humans even we do not understand. AND, they know us well. All the more reason to meditate on the Word of God... if there is Scripture on your mind, there isn't room for attack, is there?

And doesn't this make God so much bigger than the little boxes we usually put Him in...

Authority

2006-07-21T08:45:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine has been co-teaching a class in my home church on the book "Bondage Breakers". I haven't read the whole book yet, but I had the priviledge to sit in on one of these classes not long ago. I got some new insight into an old idea...

I'd always heard that at the fall of man, Adam gave up his relationship with God. The super close, daily walking in the cool of the day thing that they had was gone. I never realized the authority issue. That Adam gave his authority to the enemy. Humans were created last...the crown of creation so to speak. And God gave authority over all the earth.

Gen 1:26-28 "Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, according to our likeness. They will rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, the animals, all the earth, and the creatures that crawl on the earth. So God created man in His own image; He created him in the image of God; He created them male and female. God belssed them, and God said to them, "Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth, and subdue it. Rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, and every creature that crawls on the earth."

It was illustrated like this: Three people went to the center of the room. One stood on a chair, one person stood next to that, and one sat on a chair on the other side of the standing person. The first person represented God. His authority is above us, higher than us. At creation, we (man) were in the middle, just beneath God, and satan was in the chair...below us. But at the fall, Adam gave our authority to satan...he stood above us, and we sat in the chair. He now rules the earth. (That's why there are disasters and bad things happening in nature. ) But God never intended satan to rule. He created us to do that. But we don't realize it. We just accept things as they are. "Well, this is how things have always been, so I guess that's how they are"... . But that's a bunch of hooey! God created us in His image! Sons and daughters of the King. So God sent Jesus to get it back for us. Jesus came as a man, to take back authority for man. We now have that authority! We only have to claim it. And even thought satan rules the earth, he does not rule us...God's children. So take back your authority! The enemy only gets to mess with us if we give permission. We give permission by accepting things as we've always thought them to be. Step out of your box!

So next time you're tempted, attacked, or fighting spiritual battle claim your authority! Your enemy has no power over you unless you give it to him.

God said No...

2006-07-10T13:10:00.000-07:00

I had this sent to me...thought it was worth posting.

God said No...

I asked God to take away my habit.
God said, No.
It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up.

I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.
God said, No.
His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary.

I asked God to grant me patience.
God said, No.
Patience is a byproduct of tribulations; it isn't granted, it is learned.

I asked God to give me happiness.
God said, No.
I give you blessings; Happiness is up to you.

I asked God to spare me pain.
God said, No.
Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me.

I asked God to make my spirit grow.
God said, No.
You must grow on your own, but I will prune you to make you fruitful.

I asked God for all things that I might enjoy life.
God said, No.
I will give you life, so that you may enjoy all things.

I asked God to help me LOVE others, as much as He loves me.
God said...Ahhhh, finally you have the idea.

THIS DAY IS YOURS. DON'T THROW IT AWAY!

Changes...

2006-07-07T12:32:00.000-07:00

"Iz, I need a change..."

The words above were spoken to me by a friend. He has AMAZING hair! But, being the artist he is, can only go so long with the statis quo. There must be change. But I, having so much change this year, am not ready for his transformation.

The last time he was feeling frumpy the spiky, wild hair that I loved was relegated to "growing out". My masterpiece of creativity on his head, leaving?! The most fun I can have with a razor had always been the sculpture that his coif had always been! During the arduous phase there were months I couldn't even look at him. It was a difficult time for me. Being a hair princess, those close to me need to have fantastic hair. When it is any less than so, it pains me. Physically. Nauseated just looking at my peeps sportin' a bad rug. But it did grow. And it grew on me. I've come to love those long locks. Silky soft without tons of product...perfectly pet-able. I love to have my own noggin caressed, and it relaxes me to do so to others. (which makes my dog AND my friends really spoiled and lazy) And so the long became my friend. My proud creation. Happiness in an unmanicured, au-natural, product-less mane. It was wonderful in it's free-flowing simplicity. And he looked a little hot in a Keith Urban kind of way.

And then those words...those dreaded, cursed words... "Iz, I need a change." NNNNOOOOOO!!!!! I put him off for weeks. Nope. Not gonna. I'm not ready. But alas, he is a charmer, and he worked me hard. And so, on July 7 with only a straight razor in my hand and tears in my eyes, we kissed Keith Urban good-bye... And I created the single most fantastic cut I have ever created. Sculpture has new meaning. I'm still sad, and not sure I'll be able to even look at him for at least a few more days. But sometimes change can be good...even when it's painful.

And yes, I'm a little dramatic... .

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles

2006-06-27T15:19:00.000-07:00

I went to my brother's wedding last weekend. Beautiful, as weddings should be. The Perfect Couple in the Perfect Ceremony, followed by the Perfect Reception. Lots of friends, lots of family, ...it was wonderful. Later that evening while relaxing at a friend's house, I started not feeling well. It had been a long and very busy weekend with very little sleep, and I'd arrived by plane...never a good combination for me. By the time I arrived at the airport for the flight home, I was full on SICK. Upper respiratory nightmare. Which is soooo much fun to fly not feeling well. Air travel being what it is in the 21st Century, I had 2 layovers. The first one turned out much longer than expected, so I had time to think...

My plane was delayed. Just like life. I know where I want to go, I have the ticket...but it's gonna be delayed a little longer. Finally, we can board the plane. About 12 people got on the plane, and just behind me they stopped the line. "The airport is closed." What? What airport? This airport? Who knew that they close the ramps when there's lightning? I knew planes get grounded for heavy rain, but closing the ramps? And so the few of us onboard wait. And wait. When the plane finally fills and everyone is onboard, the very pleasant pilot informs us this plane had some mechanical issues which had caused the delay in the first place and now needed some adjustments. The lav's needed to be serviced. We were full of crap. Sound like my life? I did have to laugh. We then got the word that our destination was experiencing some heavy weather. We would need more fuel so as to circle when we get there. Wait. For. Fuel. I didn't really need to have the 2nd layover...maybe there was another plane and I could get a direct flight? I asked the flight attendant. No, all other flights were full. It's this, or nothing. When we finally taxied away from the gate, we then waited in a long line to take off. Five hours after scheduled departure, we finally got in the air. So here's the spiritual mirrors...

I have a ticket to my future and know where I want to go, where I'm supposed to go. But I'm full of crap and need some fixing inside. I'm waiting for the hopes and dreams to come true...for the plane to take off and to reach my destination. I'm on the right plane....there is no other plane to be on. All the other flights are full. This is my plane. But the enemy does not want me to reach my destination. And he is doing everything he can to sabatoge and delay my plane. But God is my pilot (not the co-pilot...we're not in the 70's anymore), so I am going to get to my destination. And I'll be right on time... (This just in from Monica..."God is the pilot. Once in awhile He lets me peek in the cockpit." )

The art of listening

2006-06-09T13:28:00.000-07:00

I've been reminded this morning of the importance of listening. Listening to God, letting Him lead, and also listening to those around us. Two things triggered this epiphany...

Last night I was invited to the studio to hear a friend record a track for his upcoming LP. I was floored and absolutely blown away by what transpired within me. Years ago I lived in a recording studio. It was in many ways the most wonderful time in my life, because of how my soul was comfortable and 'at home' there... It was such a huge part of who I am. The creativity that flows in a session is so contageous and amazing! But it was also, one of the most horrible times in my life because I was in an emotionally abusive relationship and was introduced to many of the drugs that became my slavemasters. I was simultaneously content and horribly wounded. The wounds ended up far outweighing the contentment. And those wounds I was dealt there were deep indeed. But they were so long ago, I had forgotten they were there. But God has not forgotten them. And He has started healing those places. In the process, He's reminded me just how important it is to me to have musicians in my life! I have said my whole life that I need to be married to a musician, but last night reminded me WHY that is so important to me. And that I cannot ever settle for something less.

The second epiphany came this morning at the dentist's office. I haven't been to a dentist for a long time. Too long. So they had some work to do. Okay. The Dr came in with the novacaine. Now, I have a very low drug tollerance. And I told him such. And maybe he did listen sort of, but nevertheless, here I am 4 hours later numb from above my eyes to the base of my neck, and from behind my ears to the tip of my nose. Unable to speak, barely able to swallow, but resting comfortably at a friend's apartment. So I am reminded of the importance of listening. 'I' knew that he shouldn't put too much anesthetic in, but he has a degree and years of experience...so of course he knows how much to use. But in not listening to me, I am left numb. And a little angry. Upset, anyway. Hurt.

Listening involves empathy, compassion, and patience. And trust! Trusting that the person speaking knows more about how they feel than do I. Even if I have years of experience. Do I really listen to the people in my life? Or do I hear but not apply. Do I hear with just my ears, or with my heart? And listening to God involves those same things. Do I trust God...that He knows what's best for me? That if I just let go, He'll heal some places I didn't even remember were there. Am I listening when He says, "Child, I love you, and want you to be whole." Do I listen to God with compassion, that He is my Father who wants only good for me? Do I listen with patience, that He will heal in His perfect timing?

I am so grateful for a compassionate, empathetic God who listens to me with infinate patience. He knows me well. Am I listening to Him? Are you?

2006-05-31T14:29:00.000-07:00

This morning I had opportunity to pray with my neighbors across the hall at my business. The question came up, how do you get God to answer prayers? If you’re sick, for example, how do you get God to heal you? Pray, right? Ask God for it, no? Turns out, not necessarily.

James 5:14-16 (emphasis added)

“Is anyone among you sick? He should call for the elders of the church, and they should pray over him after anointing him with olive oil in the name of the Lord. The prayer of faith will save the sick person, and the Lord will raise him up; and if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The intense prayer of the righteous is very powerful.

vs.17-18 Elijah was a man with a nature like ours; yet he prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the land. Then he prayed again, and the sky gave rain and the land produced its fruit.

The cool thing about hearing someone from outside America read scripture is that you hear it in a different way. The accent makes it seem like hearing it new again. And different things jump out. (I highly recommend getting a friend with an accent to just randomly read scripture out loud to you.) So here’s what I heard…

Is there anyone among you sick? He should call for the elders of the church, and THEY should pray for him. (Not that he should cry out to God repeatedly until even God is sick of his whining...this is of course an Iz phase.) (The elders will have the faith for the healing, even if the sick persons’ faith waivers.) Therefore, (and what is the therefore there for?) confess your sins to each other (to be held accountable, and so your friend will remind you that God did answer prayers) and pray FOR ONE ANOTHER, (not for yourself all the time) and YOU may be healed. The intense prayer of the righteous is very powerful (when you take your selfishness out of it) Elijah was a man with a nature like ours (he struggled with faith just like us, and had doubts and sins), yet he prayed earnestly (it doesn’t say whining here, or that he only prayed for himself) and it did not rain…

I was reminded this morning of how often I am selfish and praying first for myself and my needs, wants, and concerns before I pray for those around me. Very humbling morning. Thanks for listening. I’d love some of your thoughts on this, too.

PS. A friend just put her 2 cents in…just pray and don’t try to overanalyze so much. God will change your heart as you just keep praying. Good stuff. Thanks!

Cat wisdom

2006-05-06T23:35:00.000-07:00

I'm watching my cat sit in the window. It's her favorite spot in the whole house. Layed out on the back of the sofa, head shoved thru the 4 inch opening, which is how far the lock lets it open. Her tiny face pressed against the screen, mini blinds fanned out across her little back...a nuisance to her, I'm sure. From this vantage point she sits, most of the day and into the night, watching the world go by. Wishing. Longing to be outside. When the dog goes out, my dear kitten runs to the back door to try to escape with said dog. And finding her way blocked by the screen there also, sits and cries until the pup comes in. Sometimes even clawing at that screen. (But, with no claws it doesn't help much.) So engrossed is she with what is going on out in the yard and street beyond, she does not live much of a life indoors. Just sitting in the window, longing to be somewhere other than here.
How often am I that same way? Longing so much for something else to happen. So fixated on that thing, that I stop really living life and just live in the wishing. Funny thing about wishing...it isn't really life. I've heard teaching that we should "stay in the longing". "Don't let go of desire". But I'm not sure that's a good thing for everyone. I know very well that I'd like to be outside. But the screen I'm surrounded by won't allow me to go there. And if I just sit in this window, longing to be out there, what is happening to my life at that moment? Am I really living? And if I am so emersed in my longing, can I really be Jesus' hands and feet to those around me? How long am I supposed to wallow? I know what I want, but can't have it at this moment. The timing isn't right. God has to do the next step, and if I take it upon myself to create my dream anyway, I'll create Ishmael. Not really the promised heir. Not exactly what God had in mind. Ooops. Oh yeah, God's timing...that's the one I'm supposed to choose. But where does the longing give up? At what point am I supposed to say, "this isn't happening, I give up"?
"Love is patient and kind, not jealous, not boastful, not proud, rude or selfish, not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not gloat over other peoples' sins but takes its delight in the truth. Love always bears up, always trusts, always hopes, always endures. Love Never Fails..."
I guess I'm not supposed to give up. Keep on hoping. Praying. If I look at it hard enough, will I know how to live when it really gets here? Will I know how to act 'outside'? ...

2006-01-22T14:05:00.000-08:00

This is the first time I've had to write in so very long... The new year has begun with a big, big bang! Time is incredibly precious. There is so little of it outside of this business venture God has placed me in. Last week was the first time since it all began in September that I've been able to leave the spa without putting in 12-15 hours in a day. My wonderful friends called to invite me to things...nothing earth shattering...just life. Movies, dinner, "Lost", ... The amazing and wonderful things all of us take for granted on a daily basis. And I went. How amazing to feel normal for a few days... Life is all about relationships...and working as hard as I've been has left little time for the relationships in my life. And I've been sorely lacking. Really feeling the loss. The the enemy loves to prey on that... Sometimes the best fight in the battle for our souls is to just go to the movies with friends! Knowing someone cared enough about you and your work load to call and say, "Lock the door and come out with us" can be an enormous weapon against the lies the enemy loves to whisper.
Call a friend this week. Invite them to dinner, to the movies, over to just hang and watch football, ...ask how it's going. Sometimes your "got it all together" friend is just barely hanging on...

back to living

2005-11-11T00:31:00.000-08:00

Well,... it's been awhile. Life seems to have gotten in the way. But I think I'm finally back among the living. It's so interesting to me how we so often pray and pray for something to happen...anything...just make it different than this. And then when God jumps into our lives in full on party mode, we feel so inadeqate and pray for life to slow down. "Please God, let something happen". Followed by, "Please God, slow down! I can't handle this so fast". "Make it happen. Make it happen." "Wait, I don't want anything to happen".
I'm not quite at the praying for it to stop. I am, however, in the full on party mode. And seeking His will. He has called me to something I cannot possibly do on my own. And isn't that exactly where we should be? In the midst of bringing glory to our Creator merely because the impossible is happening.
I had a conversation yesteday with a close friend about this very thing. How the church is following the world's example in 'specializing'. That there are pastors and leaders out there preaching that we should concentrate our efforts on what we're good at. You know, use the gift you've been given, and be the best at that one thing. The guy next to you has a different gift, so he'll do his thing, and the 'body' works efficiently that way. This all sounds pretty logical. But I don't believe it's the right focus. Isn't the whole point of life that I have no idea what I'm doing, so if God doesn't step in and bring a miracle with Him, everything will collapse? If I am so far out of my comfort zone that I can't possibly accomplish whatever it is I'm called to, then God gets all the glory! If I am in over my head, then I have to really lean on Him...and isn't that where we should be all the time? Cuddled up on the Father's chest...resting in His embrace...laying my agenda on the alter.... .
So, I'm in over my head. Far outside my comfort zone. Feeling incredibly inadeqate and unprepared. And I love it! Because THIS is the place that I can point to my Savior! It is ONLY through HIM that I can do any of this thing...this thing He has called me to. Izabella Day Spa. Who would've ever thought I would own a spa? And yet here I am, with my name on the door. Sign outside. And a gorgeous website Brad worked hard on. (check it out... www.izabelladayspa.com) ;) He has my full attention...I'm watching to see what's next. Watch with me, won't you?

Similarities?

2005-09-09T09:38:00.000-07:00

Can you tell if these images are from Indonesia? Or Mississippi? We are a global village. I've been to the other side of the world to help those in desperate need... Mississippi is alot closer. And you can help. From sorting donations in your own town, to giving money to aid organizations like Samaritan's Purse, or donating blood at the Red Cross...YOU can help!

Intermission

2005-08-30T22:46:00.000-07:00

I'm going to take a break from my comentary for a few days. Katrina and the horrors that have accompanied her have brought me to my knees. Literally. And I need to stay there for a while longer.

I have to admit, I've been jaded to the whole tragedy. Indonesia was worse, if you can imagine, than even this. And the emotional rollercoaster I was on then has tried to bubble up. I think I shut down with this one, you know? Just didn't let myself feel it. Yesterday I broke. I am so grieved for my country. That Americans could be so cruel to one another is beyond me! That humans can be so cruel to each other! How could anyone leave their neighbor to die? Everyone is in the same boat here people! If we work together, everyone can get to safety...everyman for himself philosophy means we all die. I can't even fathom what happened inside the Superdome! I am so shocked by the evil that exists!...and yet, I shouldn't be. Our enemy prowls around like a lion, looking for those he can devour. New Orleans seems like the lion's den right now. Say what you will about Indonesia...a third world country, run entirely on Islamic law, ...sounds like a place for evil to exist, no? Conjours thoughts of jihad and America-bashing terrorists... . But those people helped their neighbors! They all banded together in their time of tragedy to save the person next to them...not rape or murder that person...or leave them to die! It wasn't every man for himself there. And doesn't that shame us! America is thought of, in places around the world, as evil itself. We're thought of as the devil incarnate. Evil walking around. And as the world watches us in this disaster, don't we just personify exactly that?... Our only saving grace are the thousands of people outside New Orleans who are helping. People taking strangers into their homes. People willing to go and do what needs to be done. Donating clothing, food, medicine, and all the sundries of life. Giving time and money. To all of you, I salute you! Thank you for renewing my hope in humanity...that not everyone is evil. That American's do care about each other.

The other similarity here is that New Orleans is getting all the attention. During the tsunami, news agencies kept saying, "Banda Ache, the hardest hit area..." . No, ... Banda Ache is the biggest city. The hardest hit areas were the fishing villages all along the coast. The village we were in had had NO AID at all, until a week before we arrived...two full months after the tsunami! (who's crying about 4 days lack of response?) And, okay, Banda Ache was devastated. And it was horrible. Our village had lost 90% of it's people! 90%!! And so it is with Mississippi. New Orleans is getting all the attention. Yes, it's horrible there! And yes, it's more awful than anyone can imagine! But Mississippi is worse! Tiny towns along the coast that have nothing left and no one to help them...because the world is focused on the big cities. So let's not forget there are thousands of people hurting in ways we, in our comfortable homes, cannot even imagine!

I'm planning on going... . There is a training session Sat. Sept 10 at The People's Church in Franklin, TN; and also one on Sat. Sept 17th. I encourage all of you...step out of your comfort zone. Reach out to your neighbor. Everyone can do something! We're all in this together.

arriving at base camp

2005-08-29T22:52:00.000-07:00

Flying in a single engine cessna is such a cool experience! Bubba took the co-pilot spot with a smile from ear to ear! You feel everything in those planes…amazing ride! I dozed off a little, and wished the air conditioner didn’t work so well…we were just getting used to the sweatiness.

Two hours later we reached the coast. The silence among us was deafening as we tried to take in what we were seeing. You could clearly see the line of destruction…exactly how far the waves went inland. In some places, it was nearly 3 miles. Dead trees, piles of rubble, standing stagnant water, …as far as the eye could see down the coast. We landed on a very small strip of very bumpy pavement, unloaded our supplies, and before we knew where we were going or how we would get there, our pilot waved goodbye and was gone. Funny though…I was never frightened or apprehensive…God gave me a peace I didn’t know was possible.

We got into a rickety van with a man who didn’t speak any English, and made the hour and a half journey into our village. Did we even know if he was taking us to the right place?…I don’t remember. I cannot even describe to you the ‘road’, or what lay beside it along the way. They had rebuilt the road very fast…trying to get aid to the villages…with sand and gravel. There were bits of pavement here and there, but for the most part, was …we’ll let’s just say I’ve been on 4 wheeling tracks through the woods in America that were better ‘roads’. During our time there, several of our men got stuck on that road for hours when it collapsed under a truck…. You can’t just call AAA in Indonesia. You have to dig and upright that overturned truck by hand. Chest high rubble as far as you can see lay beside that road. Here and there were shacks…put together with found pieces of broken boards.

We went all the way through the village, out to a remote piece of property at the water’s edge. The road was washed out beyond us…we were at the end of the road…literally. Almost dusk. Dinnertime. We pulled up to a cracked concrete slab…were a home had been…that had a piece of tin over it, secured by bamboo poles at each corner. There were half a dozen pup tents set up in a central area, and scrub brush and debris scattered among the palm trees…and that was it. Base camp. There were 3 or 4 women on the “kitchen” slab, trying to figure out what to feed us. There was no food. A couple of granola bars and a can or two of tuna. Plain rice. We opened the boxes of Swiss rations…God had sent us the Swiss army to feed us that first night! And, as it ended up, the next day as well.

First order of business for me… find a place to pee. Not an easy task where there are no shrubs to hide behind…and palm trees don’t shield very much. There was a pile of debris that worked in the moment …praying no one could see us (Laura was with me)…thankful it was only pee… wondering why I couldn’t have been a boy at that moment… .

Seven girls were in our tent that first night. Laid out on the floor body to body with people you just met, so hot, sweat pools in your eye sockets… with no mat to sleep on. Welcome to Ache provence. Merely 120 miles from the epicenter of the earthquake that caused incredible devastation in so many countries. I could not have felt more 'at home'. Knowing I had be brought by God himself to the other side of the world. He had a purpose for me being there. Me. And I slipped off into sleep with a sense of peace in this unknown... .

waiting for a plane

2005-08-28T22:28:00.000-07:00

We were driven to an airstrip in a rickety van driven by a man who spoke no English. There were several old planes lying around…rusting corpses of metal, left to rot in the heat. Other planes scattered along the strip were waiting for pilots and cargo. Pallets of cargo here and there, fork lifts driven by military personnel …lots going on. We were taken near a hanger to a tent…Army issue, green heavy canvas, with it’s sides all rolled up to catch the little bit of breeze. On one side were stacks and stacks of boxes up on palettes…supplies waiting to ship into villages. On the other side of the tent were a half dozen folding chairs, an incredibly antiquated scale, and a radio with a white marker board under it, scratched with time schedules. That radio turned out to be air traffic control. We were immediately put on the scale, one at a time, holding our carry on, to see if we would all be able to go, or if we, or our meager possessions, had to stay behind. (just try to pack ten days of necessities into a 20# carryon…) I think I like being weighed in kilos…it sounds so much better than the heavier pounds! Then it was time to wait. And sweat. Merely 35 hours away from the winter we had left…into a 95 degree humid blast furnace. The little bit of breeze was like heaven…

It seems unusual to be grateful to sit in the intense heat for three and a half hours waiting for a pilot to return… but it gave us time to relax, process the journey so far, pray about what was to come, and most importantly acclimate to the climate. Our pilot, I might add, had volunteered to take us… he took 2 trips, and I’m not sure he was paid for his time. (I am so incredibly impressed with Samaritan’s Purse all the way around!) While waiting, one of our girls, who hadn’t slept the whole journey thus far, hit the wall, so to speak. The exhaustion, the heat, the “bathroom” we found to use at this airstrip…it was too much. She laid down on top of the boxes in the tent with a nauseus headache. Some of us went exploring. There was a feeling of danger… uncertainty…and we were told not to go far. The Swiss army was pulling out and packing gear, and we needed to stay out of their way. As they left, a man came to ask if we wanted a snack. Absolutely! He brought over 9 brown boxes and wished us well. As we opened one, we discovered it was survival rations. It was incredible all that was in those boxes! We weighed them to see if they’d fit, and ended up leaving a few other things behind to make room. Little did we know how wise that decision was…

Singapore is incredibly beautiful

2005-08-24T21:31:00.000-07:00

Singapore is incredibly beautiful! Amazingly clean for such a large city. The airport seemed kind of small for such a city. We walked out into the warm night air, thick with flowers and blooming trees. Our bus ride from the airport to hotel and back again was peppered by the most entertaining tour guide. He was so funny! “Ahhhhh, Mustafa…”. He gave us the exact same speech coming and going…as if we weren’t the same group. Gave us tips on shopping, dinning, and nightlife. (we were there 4 hours) “Singapore is a fine, fine city. Drop cigarette on ground, $500 fine. A fine city!” Several of us still break into that dialog! We loved that guy.

From Singapore to Medan is about 3 hours. The Indonesian airline serves a meal in-flight. I can’t say I’ve ever had a more unusual sandwich. Roast beef and tuna salad together with a cucumber all on the same white bread. I wasn’t really sure it was tuna salad…but it was something along those lines. Sounds awful…was surprisingly good! And it’s weird to have smoking on the plane…we haven’t done that in America for how many years now? Oh, and our first whiffs of some body odor. Being outside the US can be so liberating in ways…and horrifying in others. Okay, so horrifying is kind of a harsh word, but we’re just too addicted to our soaps, deodorants, and perfumes. We just aren’t prepared for what assaults us in other countries. And yet, we, technically, are the odd ones. And for what? I mean, humans have bodily functions…why are we so uptight and freaked out by them? And yet, oh yeah baby, I’m freaked out!

Once on the ground in Medan, we were greeted by a little chaos. We were meeting a contact person we had never seen so much as a photo of, and were not sure at all what was next. Our information only went as far as a name of someone to meet us there, with no idea how we were to get from that airport out to the village. As we exited the plane, the heat was incredible. Remember, this was in late February…it was still winter back home. Going into the airport from the tarmac we walked across an antimicrobial matt in the doorway…supposedly to kill off mad cow and hoof and mouth type viruses and such. It made me a little uneasy.
I, of course, had to pee really bad! Welcome to Asia. My first encounter with a 'squattie'. Picture a gas station bathroom. Now imagine instead of a toilet, a porceline hole in the ground to squat over. Yes, squat. (Hello quads. Hope you've been doing leg presses at the gym...you're gonna need those muscles!) Everything is wet. Everything. The toilet paper goes into the trash...not the squattie, and then you douse everything with water from a bucket on the floor. Be sure to refill the bucket for the next person before you leave. And welcome to Asia.

Entering the terminal we were greeted by a beautiful blonde woman with heavy accent almost shouting at us to hurry…she had to have 9 men go RIGHT NOW. Our contact person was supposed to be a man. (?) So we split up. Nine now, six… who knows when...or if. Our fearless leader was told to always go…if someone has to go, for him always to go. So Bob left, and Bubba stayed with us. I cannot tell you how much I love that man for taking control of the next situation! The nine were rushed thru customs, told to stack their luggage on a cart and RUN! So they did. We took what seemed an excruciatingly long time to get thru customs and then were told we would have to ride in vans over the mountains…16 hours… thru rebel held country. At the last second, a pilot came up and said he could take 6 people. Bubba nearly jumped on that man! “We’ve got six!” We then discovered that the nine had not been able to get any of their checked luggage. They’d just had to GO. They also, unfortunately, had all their claim stubs with them. Bubba stepped up to the plate…and got all the luggage. I was so sure we would never see those bags again. And had it been left to me, we wouldn't have. But God knew we would need all the gear we had packed in those bags...and Bubba is a faithful man who listens well to His voice. It was loaded onto vans for the trek across the mountains, as we took our carryon, crowded into a vehicle, and went to an airstrip. ...

Flying to the other side of the world

2005-08-23T21:38:00.000-07:00

Flying to the other side of the world with strangers is no small feat. Different personalities, different habits, different interests, …we needed a leader. I’ll call him ‘Bob’. This man took on the responsibility of keeping us safe, keeping the peace, smoothing ruffled feathers, explaining things he didn’t fully understand himself, keeping us motivated, calming our nerves, and corralling 14 other adults to all get thru airports and customs together, with all our gear. Whew. That makes me cringe just listing that all out. And it really isn’t half of what he did for us. Our fearless leader. Who lead us with kindness, infinite patience, laughter, and friendship. I am so honored to call this man my friend!

We had no idea when we climbed aboard a plane in Tennessee what the next two weeks would entail. There is no way to prepare for what we thought we had prepared for. But we got on that plane full of excitement at the adventure we were embarking on. As a group of 15, all excited and nervously chattering, we attracted some attention. Our flight attendant on that first leg noticed that half the plane knew each other… and inquired about our group. Obviously not coworkers. Not close personal friends. (Only 4 of us even knew each other before this trip) And what a diverse group... We had, among our ranks, 11 men and 4 women. An environmental engineer, a cop, Marine, church staff member, counselor, a computer guy, a singer-songwriter, 2 college students, entrepreneur, plumber, nurse, teacher, decorator, and hair/makeup artist. What on earth are these people doing together? When she heard we were headed to Indonesia, she not only applauded us, but also stocked us up on boxes and boxes of granola bars. She had a heart as big as the sky we were flying across. (I almost said a heart as big as her bottom, but that wouldn’t be nice, would it?) ( She had no idea the angel she really was to us! Some of us survived on those bars for days once we arrived at destination.

Forty hours travel time does something to a person. The flight to Tokyo is nearly 15 hours in the air. I slept, watched a movie, read, talked for hours to my friend who was with me, played cards, listed to his entire MP3 player, napped again, watched another movie, and thought we must be close…right? “Hey, how much longer do we have on this plane?” The answer undid me. “Four more hours.” AAAAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!! I think the words spoken to me at that moment were, “Iz, that was a ‘crazy’ laugh. I’m a little scared of you right now.” If I could have opened a door and jumped out, I would have done it! I ran to ‘Bob’, our leader. He’s a marathon runner and loves to train friends for races. It really is amazing how big those planes are… We did laps on the plane! Five times up and down the stairs as fast as we could go, then five laps around the whole plane including stairs again each time. Amazing the difference a little physical activity can do! And you’d really be surprised at how fast you can get down those skinny isles! Eight of us then gathered in one of the doorways and played Uno for three hours. We only left the game after being shushed by flight attendants numerous times…it seems the business class flyers have more than just beds that lay flat… .

Tokyo is an amazing city...

2005-08-22T21:29:00.000-07:00

Tokyo is an amazing city…so I’ve read. I wouldn’t know, even though I’ve technically been there twice. We had 50 minutes on the ground between flights. I was unaware there were back ways around airports, but apparently there are. We were ushered down one of them to get us though customs in time to catch our flight to Singapore. Our travel coordinator, who I’ll call ‘Bubba’, did an AMAZING job of keeping all our paperwork straight. He held passports at times, tickets, visas, letters of intent for relief, contact info, and made sure everyone got thru everywhere we needed to get thru. No man left behind…wait, …that’s something else. He also implemented the buddy system. Everyone had a ‘buddy’ that knew where the other was at all times. If I’m going to the ladies’ room in Medan, my buddy knows which one I’m in so if I don’t come out in a reasonable amount of time, someone will find me. It also ensured that no one was alone in a strange country, and everyone actually got on every flight. Brilliant! It worked amazingly well! He also, as my friend, arranged ahead of time to sit with me on all the flights. I had no idea you could move other people around in choosing your seat selection. He evidently did have that idea. I am forever grateful! There is nothing more comforting, crammed in the center section of coach class (with 8 hours ahead of you), than the ability to look a close friend in the eye and say, “Just so you know, you’re the wall, and I’ll be leanin’. “

From Tokyo is a flight to Singapore. Remember, there were 15 hours to Tokyo, then just 50 minutes on the ground. I recommend if you’re flying coach, to pack some Tylenol PM…anything that will knock you out! I will say that the plane we were on was well equipped. Every seat had a personal TV screen and numerous choices on music, movies, and games. You can even link movies to within a second or two to the person next to you, so you’re watching the same movie at the same time. This does take a few tries to get it just right, but, hey, you’ve got 8 hours! I did sleep a lot of that leg of the journey. Thankfully. One of my teammates was not so fortunate. She actually wasn’t able to sleep the whole journey. I’m not sure she slept for like, 60 hours or something crazy like that. Makes me want to crawl into my bed just thinking about it.

We had a few blessed hours in a hotel in Singapore. Bed to lay flat in, the last shower for who knows how long, and a hot meal. Good getting to know one another time. We had no idea then how well we would do that, and what we would really know about each other before it was all over. Breakfast came too soon, and was an interesting experience. Breakfast items are a little different in Asia. Fish Porridge (?!), miso, chicken ‘nuggets’, omelets (that were different), pancakes, cereal, pastries and odd breads, baked beans, noodles, ham, …really unusual stuff. Not very good, but welcomed.

My journal entry reads: “4:07am-Singapore time. Am @ hotel in Singapore. Last shower for the trip…felt amazing! Hairdryer doesn’t work…adapter won’t fit into socket. Breakfast @ 6:30am, bus back to airport @ 8am. Flight should leave at 11am. Met @ airport with other teams…4 in all…32 people. I guess there are more people meeting out @ the camp tomorrow. They said this is the largest group so far. [Our village] is complete devastation. There are no trees left, so it’s hotter than [other parts]. (this was not true) We met a guy in the lobby who’s been here 2 weeks. Our first order of business will be a latrine and to establish the camp.”

Indonesia...

2005-08-21T16:50:00.000-07:00

In February of 2005 I was chosen to join a team to go to Indonesia to do tsunami relief. I've told the stories lots of times since I've been home, but have been asked to write them down. So, I will attempt to do so here. May it garner interest and encourage someone else to go. So much is still needed...

Christmas vacation 2004. As Americans sat around our opulent homes, playing with the toys and gadgets we'd just gotten from Santa, on the other side of the world more than 200,000 people lost their lives in a matter of minutes. The first wave to hit Ache Provence was 80 feet high. Eighty feet. Six more waves followed, each more than 50 feet high. I cannot even fathom that. Mothers were in their kitchens, doing household chores. Most children were at school...except the little ones who were home with their mothers. Men were planning the day down on the docks. Most of the coast is lined with fishing villages and life was good. The sea is bountiful, and their comfortable homes had intricately carved woodwork and marble floors. Beautiful stucco homes with amazing tile work. We think of Indonesia as a third world country, but the life I saw there had been good. People had cars and motorbikes, they had plenty to eat, and were surrounded by extended families and friends they'd known their whole lives. And in a matter of minutes, children were ripped out of their mothers arms. Husbands couldn't get back to their homes to protect their families. Up and down the coast, people tried to run faster than an 80 foot wave moving at 500 miles per hour. How can we even imagine that kind of fear? People clinging in the tops of palm trees, battered and terrified; scrambling to the rooftops of buildings that moments later crumbled with the next wave. Within the space of a few short hours, whole villages were gone. Of others, 90% were dead. The hospital in Banda Ache, one of the larger cities, had near 900 employees before the tsunami...barely 100 survived. There was no one to help the wounded, so many that survived initially died of their injuries in the days that followed. How any person survived at all is unfathomable to me.
The pastor at my church was burdened with the burning desire to 'do' something. As his heart broke for the people there, he picked up the phone. Within days of the disaster we had sent 2 men into Indonesia to assess what we could do, and what was most needed. I cannot even imagine the things they related to us. Roads and bridges washed away completely, without a trace. Ships up on dry land, quarter miles from any water. Debris of unimaginable proportions. And human bodies everywhere...under debris, strewn across fields, and even in the trees. These are men that will never be the same having seen what they experienced those first few days.
It takes time to organize teams to go. I am so incredibly grateful for the individuals who were able to go in those first few weeks. The brave and fearless people who work for aid agencies and arrive within days of something like this. For people who reached out to the survivors nearest them and helped strangers in chaos. My team arrived two full months after the fact. Incredible that it took that long, and yet, incredible that it was that fast. The shots, the passports, cultural information classes, coordinating time off from jobs, travel arrangements to the other side of the world... . We were technically team 2 to go, but as the area team 1 had gone to was inundated with aid and the government nervous about westerners, we went to a completely different area. The village we arrived at had had no aid until a week before we arrived. No aid. Two whole months after the tsunami. No food (other than coconuts), no clean water, no shelter, ...no aid. Unimaginable. And yet, reality.
So 15 of us kissed our loved ones farwell and boarded a plane to the unknown.

Day 1

2005-08-17T19:37:00.000-07:00

I've been contemplating the whole blogger thing for some time now...and more of my peeps are up and running their own shows. So I secumb to the peer pressure (and the desire to write), althought I have no idea if anything I have to say will be of any importance to anyone whatsoever. We shall see, won't we?